A RUDE AWAKENING!!

Friday (5/30/14)

Well, I thought we were going to get through a week at the hospital without incident, but I guess I should know to always expect the unexpected/bad news/changes...not really sure at this point! I woke up feeling pretty good because I had a wonderful dream! In my dream, the baby was born and was completely healthy! The crazy surprise was that he was really early (probably between 24-25 weeks) and had no breathing problems. We got to take him right home! Too bad that was a dream.

After being awake for a minute I realized something was not right, I noticed I was, well not dry and I thought to myself  'oh great, another huge gush!' I got up to go to the bathroom and noticed something on my bed and got worried. I feel I should add here that when I first found out about this the doctors mentioned possible bleeding, more leaking, cramping, contractions as all being bad things. Each time I went to the bathroom I was scared as to what I might find, but then after several weeks, well over a month without bleeding and some leaking my fear of what I would find when I went to the bathroom subsided...until today! I realized it wasn't just my fluid, but blood as well! (Sorry to those who think this is TMI, but it's a part of the whole process). I immediately tried to hold back my tears as I called the nurse, which let me tell you is not the funnest thing to have happen (I mean who wants to call a nurse in while you are sitting in the bathroom lol). As soon as she came in I let her know that I was bleeding and then I started to cry a little. She automatically lets me know that its completely normal for women whose water broke. She let me know that they will want to monitor the baby to make sure he's doing okay, which he did and there were still no contractions. I did have a little cramping, but they said to let them know if it gets worse. For now that has gone away.

The doctor just came in to check-in on me and acknowledged the fear that blood can bring, especially when it hasn't happened before. He reminded me that we will probably have some bumps here in there that will freak me out. He said that the baby tracing looks good and that as long as he is doing okay it is better for him to be in than out. He mentioned something about the things we do for kids and it is very true! I will continue to do what I have to so that I can bring this little guy home...he has brothers at home that will love him and welcome him with open arms, we just need to get him there!

Well the rest of the day was pretty non-eventful. In my case though I will happily accept that! Dave let me know that he was going to take the boys camping, which I knew they would love. I actually took two naps today, I think mentally I just wanted to get through the day and make it to tomorrow. I don't recall it being a very productive day at all, I watched lots of TV and had a movie night. I have only had a little bit of bleeding, but as I've done research on my boards I've found that it is quite normal so I'm trying to relax. Apparently, some women bleed so much that they need a transfusion! I just have to remember that it's me and not the baby, he is okay. All of the baby monitoring went well for the day. The boys face timed me around 10pm when they were getting ready to eat dinner, they didn't leave til 8pm to go camping and it ended up just being Dave, the boys, Jon and Ivan. They were wide awake and happy as ever! Lincoln was very excited to show me the fire and Oliver has been repeating every single thing Lincoln says...very cute! I'm glad they are having a fun time. Well that's it for today, here's hoping for a better day tomorrow!